Having read the beautiful poems from the hearts of James and Kristyne, and then seeing Mary's reply, it has encouraged me to post from my place.
Yes I too have noticed the quietness here and also realize that we all are lifting higher, and as our vibrations lift they bring also some turmoil and inner reflection. For me the turmoil has been very internal this time, I have had a lot of selftalk lately, seeming to judge myself and where I am on this path of Life. Sometimes critisizing my way of life and how I treat my body. I am of very slight build so I seem to get away with pretty much any sort of food, I am also a cigar smoker, so you see I do not treat my Temple well. In spite of all of this I found words the other day that made me realise that all things in there own time...........
I was watching an old movie called Jesus, it was around his last year or so here on earth. There was a moment when he said .... Do not worry about what you put in your mouth, worry more what comes out of it, be sure all that comes from your mouth comes from the love you have inside.
So with that I speak my Love to you all and hold you all in my heart as we tread this path together, see here is my hand hold it and I shall walk beside you :)
Hi Ian,
Yes, it does seem like there is a quiet in the storm right now. You described it very aptly. I, too, have had an internal dialogue going on. It seems I am seeing my words, my thoughts and my deeds much clearer lately – and I am finding that there are some that I would like to change, or release. But like you said, Everything in its own time…….
The equinox seemed to kindle some process within me. My words seemed to disappear, or become tangled and my ability to have “normal” outside communications dissolved. It seemed as though I made it through each day, merely going through the motions, watching myself and what was happening all around me with a detached kind of sight. Some days I did not even speak one word out loud.
As desires to communicate with others came up, there was a hesitation as I saw my motivations clearly.
At times I saw that I wanted to be the first one to bring news and information to others…. And I wondered, Why? Then I waited and felt how it was to let someone else be first.
At times I saw that I wanted the approval of another…. And I wondered, Why? I remained silent and risked disapproval – which did not come.
Many times my words would boomerang back to me right after I spoke causing me to regret speaking them. They just were not communicating what I was trying to express. So I became quieter yet. I wished I could have journaled through the experience – but I have no entries for the past couple of weeks. I have just a vague remembrance of making it through an intensely personal time of inner reflection. And like you outlined about things such as your cigar smoking…. Things came up as just facts – not judgments, or even blame really. Just like the shadows were revealed, and the light of day was shining on them. No right or wrong about it…. Just the light of truth. Here I am.
I have read somewhere that the final judgment will be of ourself…. By ourself. Perhaps this is what that feels like - To have myself laid bare to the light of truth – and look directly into the mirror. I am able to view the less than admirable traits and quirks with compassion – yet I also have the deep inner understanding why they are there – because I have lived this lifetime - in darkness, with eyes closed, and making my way the best I could. I have not forgotten the darkness that I lived in most of my life, believing it to be the only truth. Now there is an unfolding, an opening to higher levels of light, and higher levels of myself and I find that I must shed some of the old scales that I protected myself with during the dark days. As you can imagine, there is also resistance to expose the vulnerable and not-quite-tried-out-parts of me hidden underneath those scales. Part of me thinks I am just kidding myself with the words and ideas of ascension and shifting, yet I am too far into it now, to dismiss it all as fantasy or wishful thinking. I AM living the experience of it – right now.
I’ll take that hand you offer, kindred soul, grateful for the company, and share the walk along this intriguing path. I wonder what we will find just over that next hill? It’s great to feel my words come back ….and with them, a sense of peace that seemed to come within the quiet of the storm. I hope it lasts for awhile while I catch my breath.
With Love,
Mary
Hey Mary,
Thank you for sharing with us, you express yourself with grace and humility. What a wonderfully inspiring example of personal transformation.
L
Jez
Ian, thank you for posting! I've had this peaceful quiet come upon me that keeps me from posting. I am reminded that autumn is the time of drawing in to oneself and pulling away from the external to shore up the internal. (Since you're in the South, I'm afraid this doesn't apply... will you carry us Northerners through the fall? LOL... teasing)
And Mary, you hit the nail on the head. I read your post on Friday, and still had no words to reply as of this morning. I read, and agree, and nod with appreciation, and nothing else comes. Why say more when less works just as well? Like you, when my friends talk about something, I feel like I'm too slow in talking, and they've already moved to topic 2 when I'm just getting ready to talk about topic 1. Maybe winter will be a better season for posting for me. :)
I'm still here loving everyone to pieces... just quietly.
Love you lots!
Kathy